Talk:Super Shy

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Super Shy/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Nominator: Lililolol (talk · contribs) 20:59, 5 June 2024 (UTC)

Reviewer: Wuju Daisuki (talk · contribs) 19:39, 12 June 2024 (UTC)

Good Article review progress box Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV () 3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant () Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Hi! I'll try to get this review done soon. It's my first review, but I'll try to do it well. Might get a more experienced reviewer to look after it when I'm done. Good day, Wuju Daisuki (talk) 19:39, 12 June 2024 (UTC)

Lead

• It is an incorporation of liquid drum and bass, bubblegum, and Jersey club using a club-inflected bass drum pattern. Nothing about club-inflection on the sources, just staccato bass drum
• Written by Gigi, Kim Dong-hyun, Erika de Casier, Kristine Bogan, Frankie Scoca, and NewJeans member Danielle, it is about the nervousness of confessing to a first love. I think the "written by" lumping of every composing-lyrics-producer credit fuzzes up things; I see someone was adding that Danielle composed the song, though that's not the case, and that ambiguous sentence might be why
• The single was NewJeans' third number-one hit on the South Korean Circle Digital Chart, where it spent eight weeks at number one. The eight weeks is not verified in the article
• The choreography, by Black.Q and Eunju Kim, showcases the members performing waacking and accessible moves, with NewJeans dressed in youthful outfits and featuring Wes Anderson-inspired visuals. "Accessible" to me insinuates, like, easy to access for the disabled in such, while in the sources it's said the dance was made so that "anyone can easily follow along"—maybe change accessible to "easily followable". Also only one critic pointed out Wes Anderson as like a guess, it's not like Min Heejin or Shin Heewon pointed out Wes
• To promote the single, they appeared on various South Korean music programs, resulting in six first-place music program awards, including a triple crown on Inkigayo. The "they" is referring to NewJeans, but in the previous sentence NewJeans are at the very back (not where a subject would usually be); you could replace "they" with NewJeans or just say "the group" to reduce some of that vagueness
• Oh and also in the infobox, the B-side being NewJeans doesn't make sense as Super Shy wasn't released as an A-side B-side single, but as part of an album

Background and composition

• South Korean media outlets reported that the album would be released in July 2023, preceded by one of its B-side tracks set to be released on July 7. Not exactly what the source says, it doesn't mention a B-side: I'd modify it to "preceded by a prerelease track set to be released on July 7." I'm also not sure if the term B-side, in its meaning within the K-pop industry (= an album track that is not the lead single, or "title track"), will be understood by general audiences
• In June 2023, ADOR announced that NewJeans would release their second extended play, Get Up, on July 21, 2023, and revealed the release date for the lead single, "Super Shy," and one of the B-side tracks, "New Jeans." I don't think the citation verifies the content. Also the B-side thing again
• "Super Shy" was composed by Erika de Casier, Kristine Bogan, and Frankie Scoca, who also handled the production. For some reason the Melon link () links to the information, for the whole Get Up album, not the individual song information. The other one is fine, verifying the Scoca production
• NewJeans sing "I'm super shy, super shy / But wait a minute while I / Make you mine, make you mine / I'm trembling even now / You're on my mind / All the time / I wanna tell you but I'm / Super shy, super shy", wishing to muster the courage to confess to their first love, a recurring theme in their discography. Quote from the source: "특유의 설레고 순수한 가사도 눈에 띈다. 서툴고 풋풋한 첫사랑을 소환시키는 뉴진스다운 노래 가사다. [The characteristic heart-fluttering, pure lyrics stand out. They're lyrics characteristic of NewJeans that summon up the clumsy, innocently inexperienced feelings of first love.]" Nothing about recurring themes. Also isn't the quote a bit long

Reception (& commercial performance)

• Not too much about the main reception section (I fixed the only issue a few days ago) but maybe you could lay off on the quotations a bit? Though there's a nice prose gap between them
• "Super Shy" debuted at number 27 on South Korea's Circle Digital Chart in the issue dated July 2–8, 2023. [...] "Super Shy" debuted at number one on both Singapore's Top Streaming Chart and the Malaysia International chart. The song debuted at number one on the Billboard Hits of the World charts for Hong Kong and Taiwan, earning NewJeans their first and third number-one in the country, respectively. Feels a little stiff and repetitive - maybe change the structure to "The song debuted at number one on Singapore's Top Streaming Chart, the Malaysia International chart, and the Billboard Hits of the World charts for Hong Kong and Taiwan, earning NewJeans their first and third number-one in Hong Kong and Taiwan respectively." Also not sure of the first and third claims (though those are probably behind the Billboard Plus paywall in the citation)
• It rose to number one the following week, earning NewJeans their third number-one song in the country after "Attention" (2022) and "Ditto" (2022). Source on third number one statistic? The source right now is just a chart

Music video

• It was directed by Shin Hee-won, who had previously directed music videos for NewJeans' songs "Attention" and "Hurt". Could we get a non-primary source for the Attention and Hurt directing credits
• [...]the fast high-energy choreography was based on waacking and purposefully includes accessible moves. See the point in the lead

Accolades

• "Super Shy" won Artist of the Year – Global Streaming at the 13th Circle Chart Music Awards. Super Shy didn't win it, NewJeans did—and the source linked doesn't even mention Super Shy the song

References

Final comments and verdict

No edit war currently in place; I edited the article last on the sixth. The fair use rationale on the only non-free file seems to be alright except in the minimal use parameter, where it says "The file will be used only once for commentary in the 'Flower' article" but it's in the Super Shy article (probably it was a copy-and-paste from Jisoo's "Flower", your last good article), but I can't seem to change that as of now! Now let's go over what we need to change:

• Prose: Check the issues I listed in my review.
• MOS: Fix the statement in the lead that isn't verified in the body
• RS: Half and half on some of the Korean sources (ex. Xsportsnews) but that could be my own bias
• OR: There are some sources that don't verify the text, as stated in my review (I know that's kind of stretching OR but making sure citations verify the text is a GA guideline!)
• CV: Neutral until we get to the "Super Shy" quote. Otherwise it seems all good

We're  On hold until all these issues are fixed. Good day, Wuju Daisuki (talk) 16:11, 16 June 2024 (UTC)

Oh and also in the infobox, the B-side being NewJeans doesn't make sense as Super Shy wasn't released as an A-side B-side single, but as part of an album. Well, 'Super Shy' was released as a standalone single alongside 'New Jeans,' according to Apple Music,[1] and many publications pointed out that the two songs were released together before the album. Later, it was included in the album 'Get Up.' Therefore, it can be considered an A-side and B-side type of track. Lililolol (talk) 19:04, 20 June 2024 (UTC)

I've fixed the lead, background, composition, and music video sections. However, I couldn't find a non-primary source for the directing credits of 'Attention' and 'Hurt.' Lililolol (talk) 19:06, 20 June 2024 (UTC)

I believe I have fixed everything, so please check it out. Lililolol (talk) 19:36, 20 June 2024 (UTC)

Also not sure of the first and third claims (though those are probably behind the Billboard Plus paywall in the citation) You can check the archived version to bypass the paywall. Lililolol (talk) 19:42, 20 June 2024 (UTC)

@Wuju Daisuki All done Lililolol (talk) 20:19, 21 June 2024 (UTC)

@Lililolol We're not all done yet; points like the B-side in the infobox, a citation for the eight weeks on Circle, or the recurring theme mention still need to be fixed Wuju Daisuki (talk) 21:40, 21 June 2024 (UTC)

@Wuju Daisuki Regarding the B-side mentioned in the infobox, as I mentioned above, it was released as a standalone track with 'New Jeans' on Apple Music. The claim about it spending eight weeks on Circle is unverified, but clicking the link should show that it spent eight weeks there. Lastly, the "recurring theme"— are you talking about Wes Anderson’s visual style? If so, I removed that part from the lead. Lililolol (talk) 18:33, 23 June 2024 (UTC)

@Lililolol The released as a standalone single w/ New Jeans needs to be clarified in the body. The eight weeks claim needs to be verified by an actual citation—a link to a chart itself won't cut it, especially when it says nowhere in the text that it charted for eight weeks. The recurring theme is talking about the sentence "It is about wishing to muster the courage to confess to their first love, a recurring theme in their discography" in the background and composition section. Also new thing with the Best Music - Fall nomination at the The Fact Music Awards: the criteria for that category in particular looks to me like it's just fan voted, even if The Fact may be a notable awards show. Wuju Daisuki (talk) 17:14, 24 June 2024 (UTC)

@Wuju Daisuki You're right, the Best Music Award depends on fan voting. Do you suggest removing it? Also, please check if there are any other issues that need fixing. Lililolol (talk) 19:32, 24 June 2024 (UTC)

@Lililolol I'd like you to remove it and then get on the rest of the issues I've already mentioned. Good day, Wuju Daisuki (talk) 19:39, 24 June 2024 (UTC)

@Wuju Daisuki I think i did fix everything, please go check it out, and have a good day Lililolol (talk) 20:12, 24 June 2024 (UTC)

@Wuju Daisuki All done. Lililolol (talk) 01:09, 25 June 2024 (UTC)

Hi Lililolol, sorry that I'm hauling all this on you. Anyways here is hopefully my last bunch of nitpicks:

• It is an incorporation of liquid drum and bass, bubblegum, and Jersey club, featuring a distinctive staccato kick drum pattern. -> "It is a mix of liquid drum and bass, bubblegum, and Jersey club, featuring a staccato kick drum pattern." (Incorporation makes no sense in this context, "distinctive" is editorializing)
• In June 2023, ADOR announced that NewJeans would release their second extended play, Get Up, on July 21, 2023, features six songs. -> "In June 2023, ADOR announced that NewJeans would release their second extended play, Get Up, on July 21, 2023, which would feature six songs."
• The song tells the story of a very shy person who has a crush on someone who doesn't even know she exists. Despite her nervousness, she eventually gathers the courage to express her feelings and take a step forward. Top closely paraphrased from GMA source? Possible fix: "The song's lyrics depict a shy person expressing their feelings to a crush." (Feel like gender neutral is better IDK)
• It also became NewJeans best-performing song in the United Kingdom, debuting at number 59 on the UK Singles Chart in the issue dated July 14–20, 2023. Add apostrophe on NewJeans (like this: NewJeans' best performing song, also that hyphen between best and performing isn't needed)

Update: I am looking for a second opinion as this is my first GA review and having to do all this myself is TBH stressing me out. I took a break for a few days and decided I should step back. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Wuju Daisuki (talk • contribs) 21:48, 27 June 2024 (UTC)