Talk:Greef Karga/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 15:06, 23 April 2020 (UTC)

• Thanks for taking on another review, The Rambling Man! — Hunter Kahn 16:41, 26 April 2020 (UTC)

Comments

• "the Bounty Hunters' Guild," always a bit odd to "part link" a "formal title". I would unlink and go for linking bounty hunter at the next chance.
  • Yeah, I think you're right. Changed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• " in a handful of episodes" curious about this as there's only been a handful of episodes of the whole show! Four episodes really is still a handful!
  • lol Changed this to say he was originally only supposed to make a brief apperance. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "ensures everyone follows" not everyone, just bounty hunters. Presumably "ensures its members follow"?
  • Good call. Changed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "so far" is a little like WP:CURRENTLY. Maybe "as of the end of the first season"?
  • Changed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• What's a cantina?
  • Changed to "bar". — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "a big job" seems a little informal...
  • Changed to "a lucrative job". — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "who insists of meeting " ENGVAR? insists on meeting?
  • Yup, should've been "on". Fixed that. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "the Force " the should be inside the pipe.
• Fixed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• Lots of triple-referencing going on, per WP:CITEKILL any chance of reducing it a little?
  • I can certainly do this; will get on it tomorrow, as it's getting a bit late for me now. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "him.[20][17][21] " ref order.
  • Fixed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• I think you've linked "stormtroopers" in other similar articles.
  • Oops, right you are. Fixed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• ""Chapter 8: Redemption"" you've already linked this as the season's "finale".
  • Removed the wikilink. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "The character is slated to return..." well Weathers has said he's definitely in it so isn't it stronger than slated?
  • Changed to "will return". — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "Actor Carl Weathers said..." no need to reintroduce Weathers here.
  • Changed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• Particularly as you have "Weathers has described his " in the previous sentence.
  • Oops, yeah, lol.
• "and Carl Weathers has" no need for Carl here.
  • Removed, — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "2019,[45][46] According" should be a period.
  • Fixed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "showrunner Jon Favreau " both overlinked. And both overlinked in the caption too.
  • Removed the wikilinks from the photo caption and the Portrayal section. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "enjoys" tense?
  • Changed to "enjoyed". — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• " series, and in " one too many run-ons. Split here.
  • Done. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "Weathers said ... Weathers performed... Weathers said " repetitive.
  • It's Weathers' world, my friend; we're just living in it! Lol I changed a few "Weathers" to other words to reduce the repetition. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "study the different energies the director and actors brought" feels whimsical, can this be "quoted" rather than written in Wikipedia voice?
  • I just reworded it a bit. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "particular enjoyed" +ly
  • Oops, yeah, fixed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• " with "The Client", " -> "with the Client"
  • Changed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "Screen Rant ranked" overlinked.
  • Removed the link in Critical Reception. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
• "performance of Carl Weathers, " no need for Carl.
  • Changed. — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)

That's all I have so I'll put it on hold for now. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 10:45, 27 April 2020 (UTC)

• Thanks again The Rambling Man! I'll try to take care of that WP:CITEKILL issue tomorrow and then I think we'll be all set unless you had anything else... — Hunter Kahn 05:27, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
  • Hunter Kahn No, I have nothing more. Give me a ping when you're ready for a final run-through. Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 08:04, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
    • The Rambling Man I believe I've addressed the WP:CITEKILL issue you had raised (most of the examples of three citations were ones in which I could simply remove one because it was just reinforcing information from the other two) so I think that addresses everything you had now, but let me know if you had any other thoughts or comments. Thanks! — Hunter Kahn 21:26, 1 May 2020 (UTC)
      • All good, thanks for your hard work. I'm promoting. I'll hopefully pick up another of your nominations in due course! Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay indoors, stay safe!!!!) 21:34, 1 May 2020 (UTC)